Autism and depression are two things that commonly co-inside. When you’re on the autism spectrum life can feel lonely and frustrating. You perceive the world differently than your neurotypical peers and sometimes your personalities and interests don’t align. This means there may be frequent misunderstandings and hurt feelings in your interactions with others. Over time, the letdown of feeling like an outsider and social rejection can take a toll on your mental health and it often causes depression.
There is a Strong Link Between Autism and Depression
Did you know that people with autism are four times more likely to develop depression during their lifetime? Furthermore, research indicates that the prevalence of depression rises with intelligence and age. This evidence is powerful and shows just how devastating negative social interactions and loneliness can be when you’re on the autism spectrum.
Bullying is a form of trauma and often causes depression amongst individuals with autism.
Bullying and loneliness are a big cause of depression amongst neurodiverse individuals. According to current research, children, teens, and adults with autism are 66% more likely to experience bullying than neurotypical individuals. But, as an autism therapist, I believe this number is actually much higher. I would venture to say that more individuals with autism have experienced bullying. Bullying comes in many different forms. It could be verbal insults, physical aggression, or even subtle microaggressions about being different.
Bullying can make one feel alone and scared. It can make an autistic person question “What is wrong with me?” People around them might call them names or criticize them, like say “You’re so weird”, “You’re a jerk”, “Why can’t you understand me, what’s wrong with you?”, or “You’re so lazy”.
Over time, they begin to internalize these messages as being true. And they think to themself, “I am weird.” “I’m not good enough.” “I’m lazy.” “No one likes me.” This leads to poor-self esteem and depression and without intervention these thoughts can be hard to overcome.
You just want to feel like you fit in.
Perhaps, you have tried to overcome these negative thoughts about yourself or feelings by pushing yourself too hard. You want to fit in so badly that you ignore your needs or feel like an imposter. This can have devastating consequences. It can cause you to feel even more frustrated when things don’t go your way, or people don’t respond the way you wish they would. Or, it can cause you to drain your social battery and meltdown. It can even cause you to become codependent on others that are not good for your wellbeing or mental health. These people can take advantage of your good intentions and desire to be liked.
Depression Makes Life Feel Hopeless
When you’re in the throes of depression things may feel really bleak. The negative thoughts that you have about yourself and your mean inner critic take over and you’re left unsure what you have to offer to the people you love. These thoughts can negatively impact all areas of your life and can make it hard for you to be independent and confident in your abilities.
Furthermore, it’s common for individuals with autism to ruminate and obsess over things in their past. This can lead to and prolong a depressive event because you’re unable to let go of the negativity. This keeps the cycle going and makes life extremely difficult and painful.
Fighting Depression with Self-Compassion
But, these harsh inner thoughts aren’t true. Your autism makes you different, but diversity is good. And autism gives you superpowers. It’s what makes you interesting and passionate.
If you’re on the autism spectrum and suffering from depression, autism therapy and/or an autism support group can help you cope with depressive symptoms, build confidence in your own identity, and learn skills to create meaningful and close relationships in your life.
One of the primary things we, as autism therapists, aim to instill in our clients at Open Doors Therapy is self-compassion. We want our clients to find peace in their neurodiversity. Our clients have been misunderstood and invalidated throughout life by others. They’ve been told they’re not good enough or treated like their feelings don’t matter. This has led them to believe many negative things about themself. We help our clients learn how to listen to their needs and validate themself. This is an act of self-compassion. It is self-compassion that helps our clients overcome feelings of loneliness and hopelessness. No longer do they see themself as weird or broken. We help them learn to unburden by releasing the deep sense of shame they carry within. They let go of the pattern of their inner critic triggering shame. And they learn to balance self-growth with self-love.
We also help our clients build skills and confidence in relating to others so that they can develop the intimacy they are wanting in relationships, and better understand neurotypical interactions and social cues. We also help our autistic clients learn about their needs and how to advocate for their own needs. This helps them from getting overwhelmed in life, or from getting to the point of an autistic meltdown.
Core focus areas covered during online group therapy at Open Doors Therapy
The Power of a Group…
Furthermore, it’s important to find a support system as it is a vital component in combating depression. Instead of surrounding yourself with negativity, look for people who will empathize with your challenges and support you as you navigate the complexities of being neurodiverse in a neurotypical world. One of the best places to do this is in a social skills group. We run online social skills groups for autistic teens, college students, adults that are designed to foster this sense of comradery. Here you will not only learn social skills and practice them, but you will meet other individuals with autism who have similar interests and struggles as you do. So, these peers really truly get what you’re going through and can offer you valuable insight, advice, and support. Click here to learn more about online autism group therapy in California.
Begin Online Autism Therapy or Online Autism Group Therapy in California:
If you’re on the autism spectrum and looking for support to overcome your depression, know you don’t have to walk this path alone. Our autism therapists are skilled at helping teens, college students, young adults, and adults navigate the complexities of having autism and depression. To begin online autism therapy in California, follow these steps:
- Contact us for a free 30-minute phone consultation using this link. You will meet with one of our autism therapists.
- Like us on Facebook. On our page, we post useful information about our autism therapy clinic.
- Sign up to receive our newsletter.
Autism Therapy Services offered at Open Doors Therapy:
Our autism therapy clinic located in the South Bay Area serves teens and adults on the autism spectrum. We help high functioning individuals who identify as having Aspergers, high functioning autism, undiagnosed autism traits, and their families.
Right now, we are providing all our autism counseling services online. Our autism therapists offer a variety of autism services including individual counseling for autistic teens and adults, parent counseling, and group therapy. Also, we run several different social skills groups for neurodiverse working professionals, college students with autistic traits, gifted youth & caregivers, autistic adults, women who identify as neurodiverse, a summer social skills college transition training program for youth transitioning to college, teens & caregivers, and a mothers group. Contact our autism therapy office for more information on our services or to schedule a consultation.
About the Author
Dr. Tasha Oswald is a trained developmental and clinical psychologist. She is also is the founder and director of Open Doors Therapy, a private practice specializing in autism therapy services in the South Bay Area, near San Francisco, CA. Dr. Oswald specializes in helping neurodiverse teens and adults and facilitating social skills groups.
