It’s no secret that women are expected to conform to a set of unwritten social norms. But, what happens when you weren’t given a copy of the rule book? This is a reality that many women with autism face as they try to navigate a neurotypical social world. Unfortunately struggling to conform and fit in leads to many challenging situations such as anxiety, depression, loneliness, and even trauma. If you’re a neurodivergent woman, you may have tried to mask your struggles and autism traits only to discover that the exhaustion of doing that day in and day out leads to meltdowns and burnout.
Your struggles are valid. But you don’t have to cope with your frustration alone. There’s a whole community of neurodiverse women out there that can relate and empathize with what you’re going through. Today, I want to discuss some of the powerful benefits you can experience from connecting with other autistic women in a safe and supportive environment.
Connection is a Powerful Antidote to Loneliness
So many of my clients share that they feel like an alien on a foreign or neurotypical planet. They don’t know the rules, and even when they try to mimic their peers' social behaviors, they struggle. This makes them feel lonely and sad.
Loneliness hurts. It can affect you both physically and mentally. Feeling lonely can lead to anxiety, depression, and trauma. It can make things seem hopeless and lead you to question whether being social is even worth it? Perhaps isolation would be easier.
Participating in some group or community of other autistic women gives you an opportunity to forge friendships and relationships in a safe space. This decreases the likelihood that you will feel lonely. And over time, this support can boost your self-confidence and give you the skills to be social in other environments.
You Can be Yourself and Stop Trying to Mask Your Autism
Women with autism are usually very good at masking their autism traits. Often so much so that they’re misdiagnosed or diagnosed with autism much later in life.
However, masking your autism traits is exhausting. Hiding who you are at your core around others requires an extreme amount of mental energy and planning. Often the toll of masking leads to autistic burnout and a variety of other mental health concerns.
But, can you imagine how freeing it would be to walk through life as your true self and feel confident? When you join a community of other neurodiverse individuals, especially neurodiverse women, you don’t have to worry about being judged or misunderstood. Instead, you may feel supported while you experiment with living life authentically.
Your Neurodivergent Peers Can Relate to Your Struggles and Offer Unique Insight and Advice
I often hear my clients express frustration that other people in their lives frequently try to offer them unsolicited “advice.” This advice, though it may come from a place of love, makes them feel as if they are doing something wrong which in turn affects their self-esteem and self-confidence.
Furthermore, this advice may not meet the needs of a neurodiverse person. A neurotypical cannot fully understand how you think or how you feel. They may be able to empathize with your struggles and pain, but their advice may not be helpful or realistic.
Talking about your struggles with a community of your autistic peers gives you an opportunity to not only share your difficulties but to receive support and advice in return. It’s nice to hear from someone who has been in a similar situation or felt similar feelings as you because you know they truly get what you’re going through.
Where to Look for a Community of Neurodivergent Women
Finding your community may be challenging and intimidating, but it doesn’t have to be. One of the major benefits that have come from this past year is the rise in online communities. These communities make it easier than ever to get the support you need even if there are not resources available in your area.
This prompted me to think about new ways to support neurodiverse individuals throughout the country. Therefore, I founded Open Doors Therapy’s sister company Neurodiversity School. The mission of Neurodiversity School is to give neurodivergent people everywhere access to support and a community of other neurodiverse individuals.
Autism Therapy Offerings at Open Doors Therapy
If you live in the state of California, we also offer a variety of autism therapy services at our counseling clinic based in Palo Alto. We offer a variety of social skills groups, a parent support group, family therapy, parent coaching and consulting, and individual autism therapy.
Begin Autism Therapy in California or Take an Autism E-Course with Neurodiversity School
If you’re looking for autism therapy services, we would be honored to speak with you about the many ways our team of autism experts can support you, your child, or your family. To begin online autism therapy in California, follow these steps:
- Contact us for a free phone consult.
- Like us on Facebook. We update helpful info regarding our practice
- Sign up for our newsletter.
If you do not live in California but are looking for support and a community of neurodiverse peers, then taking an e-course with our sister company Neurodiversity School may be the perfect fit for you. To get started, follow these steps:
- Sign up for our newsletter
- Check your inbox for more information
- When the website launches, take the quiz and find out what course is right for you or your loved one!
Autism Therapy Services Offered at Open Doors Therapy:
Other Services offered at Open Doors Therapy:
Our autism therapy clinic located in the South Bay Area serves teens and adults on the autism spectrum. We help high functioning individuals who identify as having Aspergers, high functioning autism, undiagnosed ASD traits, and their families.
Right now, we are providing all our autism counseling services online. Our autism therapists offer a variety of counseling services including individual counseling for autistic teens and adults, parent counseling, and group therapy. Also, we run several different social skills groups for neurodiverse working professionals, college students with autistic traits, gifted youth & caregivers, neurodiverse adults, women who identify as neurodiverse, a summer social skills college transition training program for youth transitioning to college, teens & caregivers, and a mothers group. Contact our autism therapy office for more information on our services or to schedule a consultation.
About the Author
Dr. Tasha Oswald is a trained developmental and clinical psychologist. She is also is the founder and director of Open Doors Therapy, a private practice specializing in autism therapy services in the South Bay Area, near San Francisco, CA. Dr. Oswald specializes in helping neurodiverse teens and adults and facilitating social skills groups.
