Many neurodiverse children need more time than neurotypical children to shift into the next activity.
This can be frustrating for parents who don’t always understand why their child is taking so long to do something that “should” only take a short amount of time. But, as parents, it’s important that we learn how to slow down and take things one step at a time. This will help our children feel more safe and secure. It will prevent us from adding more pressure which will only make things worse. In this blog post, we will discuss strategies for pacing with your neurodiverse child. We will also address ways to boost their sense of safety and security.
Being a parent is challenging
As a parent, it can be hard to watch your neurodiverse child struggle with tasks that neurotypical children can do relatively easily. You may find yourself feeling frustrated, impatient, and even helpless at times. Know that you are not alone in this experience. Many other parents are going through the same thing.
Deep down, we all have a desire for a sense of belonging and acceptance. Many parents only want their child to fit in. Not because they don’t love their child the way they are, but because they want to protect them. You may be afraid that they’ll face bullying or exclusion if they don’t conform to neurotypical standards.
It’s easy to get caught up in people-pleasing mode. The “manager” part of you may want to push your child to faster. You might find yourself tuning out to your child’s emotional needs when your own anxieties want you to speed up and get things done. This usually leads to even more anxiety and stress for both you and your child.
It’s important to take a step back and remember that your neurodiverse child has a unique set of needs. They have their own strengths, weaknesses, and quirks – like neurotypical children. And often, neurodiverse children need more time and patience to be successful.
The importance of being patient with your child
Neurodiversity is just that, diverse! Every child is different. But it is common for neurodiverse children to need more time to process information and make transitions.
This can be especially true for children with hypersensitivities or sensory processing issues. They may need more time to adjust to new environments or changes in routine. Transitions can be difficult for them. They often have to filter out a lot of extra noise and stimulation to focus on the task at hand.
If you rush from one activity to the next without accounting for your child’s needs, they can experience a meltdown. This can look like “difficult” or “resistant” behavior such as withdrawing or becoming nonverbal. As parents, we must learn to read our child’s cues. By doing so, we can prevent them from becoming overwhelmed or distressed. Being able to read their cues can allow you to know when it’s time to slow down. Or, make modifications to help your child feel more comfortable.
Strategies from a autism therapist for pacing with your neurodiverse child:
Pacing with your neurodiverse child can often feel like a juggling act. You are trying to balance their needs with the demands of everyday life. Here are some tips to help you get started:
Make a daily or weekly schedule:
This can help your child know what to expect and help them feel more prepared for each activity. Having a visual schedule can be especially helpful for neurodiverse children.
Give your child advance notice:
Whenever possible, let your child know about upcoming changes or transitions. This will give them time to mentally prepare and make any necessary adjustments.
Allow for extra time:
It’s important to plan for extra time when transitioning from one activity to the next. This will help prevent your child from feeling rushed or overwhelmed.
Slow down and take things one step at a time:
Take 25 minutes to do something that you think should take 20. You might even realize that extra time was helpful for you too.
Follow their lead:
Neurodiverse children often have a better sense of what they can handle. If they need a break, let them take one.
Be flexible and willing to adjust as needed:
Neurodiverse children often need to do things in their own way and at their own pace. Be open to adjusting your plans as needed in order to accommodate their needs.
Neurodiverse children are often more successful when they have the time and space to do things in their own way. As their parent, we can help them by pacing ourselves accordingly. This can be a difficult task, but it’s a vital one. Pacing with your child can make them feel safer with you as a parent. When you listen to them and their cues, they can trust you to advocate for them and meet their needs.
Begin Working With An Autism Therapist in Illinois
Learning to take into account all the unique needs of your neurodiverse child is much easier said than done. Our team of caring therapists would be happy to offer support in helping you achieve this goal. We offer both in-person services, and online therapy in Illinois and California. To start your therapy journey, please follow these simple steps:
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Reach out to our autism therapy practice to schedule a free phone consultation
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Meet with us for a 1-hour online intake meeting with an autism specialist. This helps us decide which services are best for you
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Begin working with an autism therapist
Other Services Offered with Open Doors Therapy
Our team understands that there are many unique concerns that come with parenting a neurodiverse child. This is why we are happy to provide a variety of services to support you and your child. We offer support for people who identify as having Asperger’s, high functioning autism, undiagnosed autism traits, and more. We also offer individual therapy, parent counseling, and group therapy. In addition, we also offer social skills groups. These include college students with autistic traits, young adults with autism, neurodiverse adults, women who identify as neurodiverse, a mother’s group, and an online parent support group. Please feel free to visit our Autism Resources page for info and helpful resources. Learn more about our services by reaching out or visiting our blog today!