In any relationship, space can be viewed as a healthy and necessary part of the relationship dynamic. This is especially true when it comes to neurodiverse partnerships, such as those between a person with autism and a neurotypical partner. At times, a neurodiverse partner may feel more drained of energy than a neurotypical partner. This is due to differences in communication or social needs.
For some, space can be perceived as a negative thing, but it’s important to remember that space can be beneficial. Giving your partner the time and space they need to recharge their energy can help them to be more engaged and present. It may start off feeling uncomfortable, but it is an important lesson to ensure the health and longevity of the partnership.
Your Partner Needs to Recharge
Keeping each partner’s need for energy replenishment in mind can help to create a balanced relationship dynamic. Just like your cellphone battery needs to be charged, so do people! Think of it this way, if your partner is drained of energy, they won’t be able to fully engage and participate in the relationship. If they don’t have the chance to recharge, your relationship might suffer as a result.
For example, if your partner needs quiet time and you want to go out for a social gathering, it is important to respect their need for recharging. If you find yourself feeling rejected when your partner needs space for themselves, remind yourself that it’s not always a sign of them pushing you away. We all have different needs, and your partner may simply need time to themselves in order to be more present during their time with you.
Making Space for Recharging & Regeneration
Giving space within a neurodiverse partnership can take many forms, such as physical distance, a break in the conversation, or even just spending some time away from one another. It is important to try and make sure that both partners are able to have time and space for recharging. This allows you both to have the energy to fully engage in the relationship, as well as time to regenerate and gain new perspectives.
As mentioned above, space can take a variety of forms.
Your neurodivergent partner may want to engage in solo activities that are more calming and centering, such as reading, journaling, or spending time in nature. On the other hand, they also might want to spend time with their friend group or engage in social activities on their own that can be energizing and refreshing.
Space can take a variety of forms, and it can have a variety of benefits too. Giving yourself and your partner the time and space to connect with yourselves can help you both gain clarity about what you need in order to stay connected. It is also a form of self-care, allowing people to take care of their own needs in addition to the needs of their relationship. Ultimately, space and recharging can help create a more sustainable and rewarding relationship.
Schedule Space If Needed
Depending on your relationship dynamics and the needs of both partners, scheduling in space can be incredibly beneficial. Some partnerships thrive on schedules and structure. This doesn’t have to look like a rigid schedule. But more like a loose guideline that both partners can follow. Having this in order can help to stay connected and allow for recharging when needed.
For others, this can look like a continuous conversation between you and your partner. It’s common for your needs in a relationship to evolve, so it’s helpful to check in with one another. For example, couples that also have children might need to adjust the space and structure in order to accommodate their changing needs.
Having continuous check-ins can also help you and your partner to make sure each of you is feeling heard and connected. If this is not the case, it’s important to take a step back and pause. Then allow each other the space and time to communicatively engage with one another. Forming a plan to allow each partner time to recharge can ensure that both partners are feeling supported in the relationship.
Having Space Helps Partners to Feel Heard and Loved, Not Abandoned
Space is an important part of a healthy relationship and it can be beneficial for both partners. This can be especially true for neurodiverse individuals who are prone to feeling sensory or social overwhelm. Remember, taking this space does not mean that you or your partner are tired of each other. It simply means that you both need a break to recharge your bodies, emotions, and minds.
Having the opportunity to take time for yourself and give your partner space allows you and your partner to support each other in the different seasons of life. It also helps partners to feel heard and loved, not abandoned or rejected. And when you communicate effectively about your needs for space, it can help you both feel heard and loved. Instead of feeling abandoned and rejected. Additionally, it supports each partner to stay connected to themselves and their partner. This allows for a healthier and more balanced relationship.
Interested in Working With a Neurodiverse Couples Therapist in Palo Alto, CA?
Space is healthy and beneficial for both neurodiverse and neurotypical partners in a relationship. Feeling drained isn’t going to allow you to be the best partner possible. Taking space and communicating in a healthier way can help you to stay connected with yourself and your partner. At Open Doors Therapy, we offer a range of services that are tailored to the individual needs of neurodiverse individuals and couples. If you’re interested in learning more about our team, our services, and which may be right for your family, you can follow these steps to gain more information:
- Reach out to our autism therapy practice and schedule a free phone consultation.
- Learn more about our services and which may be best for you or your child.
- Begin learning how to take space more effectively and communicate in healthier ways!
Other Services Offered with Open Doors Therapy
Our team understands you may need more help than learning how to take space. This is why our California-based practice is happy to offer a variety of services in support of your mental health. We also offer individual therapy, parent counseling, and group therapy. In addition, we also offer social skills groups. These include college students with autistic traits, young adults with autism, women who identify as neurodiverse, a mother’s group, and an online parent support group. Please feel free to visit our Autism Resources page for info and helpful resources. Learn more about our services by reaching out or visiting our blog today!
